The Importance of Being Peppy

Let the world rejoice! I am writing about something other than the baby!

Having a book published is a little like being drafted for the J.V. cheerleading squad. For starters, everyone from my agent to my editor to my two publicists is a rail-thin, stylishly dressed woman. But more importantly, everyone is peppy about the book all the time. (Which is why I say they are like the J.V. squad. Were they the varsity squad they would be saying nasty things behind my back that would eventually lead me to develop an eating disorder.)

On the one hand, this general peppiness is totally acceptable since everyone is on the same team and wants the book to be a huge success. On the other hand, yesterday I had an email exchange with one of the publicists that contained no less than six instances of the word "great!" (always with an exclamation point!). The scariest part is that I was responsible for at least half the "great!"s. And I am not a "great!" kind of gal. Words I like to use in my emails generally include "sucks", "ugh", and, when referring to a recent unkind review of my book that both my editor and agent deemed irrelevant, "soul-crushing."

Granted, so far a lot of the things that have happened with the book are "great!". i received some very flattering blurbs from other authors and one Hollywood director. The book has been chosen by Barnes and Noble to be in their Discover Great New Writers series, which everyone involved with the book says is not just "great!" but "huge!". And I am genuinely excited about these things. I really, really am. But somehow I am incapable of expressing my excitement in a way that doesn't sound ridiculous to my own ears, which means I end up just not expressing it at all.

This has been a problem that has plagued me for years, my inability to be peppy. As a camper I was severly reprimanded for not showing enough enthusiasm while singing "Sign out and rotate *clap* *clap*! Our team is really great!" while rotating positions during volleyball games. And in high school my softball coach threatened to pull me from my prized position batting 4th in the lineup unless I starting cheering my teammates on better.

"Infield chatter!" she'd yell from the bench, then glare at me as I mumbled into my softball glove while the rest of the team yelled peppy words of encouragement to the pitcher.

"You can do it Cindy!" they'd squeal. "Strike her out!"

At a complete loss as to what to yell, I'd just repeat whatever had been yelled by the previous girl and pretend that it was a coincidence.

"Strike her out!" I'd whisper to the long grass out in right field.

"You can do it, Cindy!" I'd tell a nearby dandelion.

And now, with the publication of my first book, I find myself in a similar situation, only this time everyone is over thirty and they're cheering me on about something that I honestly care about (as opposed to the outcome of some stupid high school softball game). So to my teammates on the J.V. Book Publication Squad I'd like to say thanks. I really appreciate the pep and the excitement and the "great!"s. I'm excited too. I just tend to use the word "soul-crushing" to describe it.