The Art of Reproduction
It is only now, after a few consecutive nights of Grade A sleeping, that I have begun to realize how very truly tired I am. Now that I no longer approach the bed each night wondering what torture lies in wait for me (will it be the inability to fall asleep? a car alarm at 2am after I have finally passed out? a single cry that Milo lets out at 3am that keeps me awake until 7am? only The Shadow knows...), I find that I can't go to bed early enough. I've taken to falling asleep at 9am with the lights on, and it is truly awesome.
All of which reminds me just how long it is taking my body to recover from pregnancy and labor. Over a year later, I'm still dealing with the aftermath of creating another human being. I went to get a facial last week and the facial lady asked if I had had a recent pregnancy. I wasn't sure if 14 months ago qualified as recent, but I said yes. She told me I had some kind of weird pigmentation on my skin that people get during pregnancy that would require many hours and many lasers to correct. Yay! More ways pregnancy is disfiguring!
And yet, everyone wants to know when we're going to get working on baby #2 - the combination of Milo entering full-blown toddlerhood and my entering my 35th year, I guess. But I cannot possibly conceive of going through all of this again. The morning sickness, the insomnia, the crying, the every-2-hour feedings. For some reason the labor and delivery I can imagine doing again - in retrospect that lasted only 36 hours, while the morning sickness, the late-night feedings and the insomnia lasted months. And if I'm this exausted with one baby at 34, how will I be at 36 or 37 with two babies?
Still, my body has been saying all kinds of ridiculous things to me lately. Like: don't you miss being pregnant? NO! Isn't it nice when Milo curls up on your lap? That won't last forever, you know. SHUT UP!
And then on the other hand we have Elizabeth Vargas, who apparently left her position anchoring the evening news when she became pregnant with baby #2. I had to find this out from watching Oprah, because I do not watch the evening news. (Does anyone? Is there anyone left out there who doesn't get their news exclusively from The Daily Show?) There is no question that life is easier on a working mother when there is only one child... Vargas says she hopes she'll be able to become an anchor again when her kids are older. And apparently NOW sent her a nasty letter, because that is how feminism should work.
Lucky for me, I still hate babies. The one thing I do not think, when thinking about baby #2, is how great it would be to have an infant around. I do not think, aww, they're so cute, I miss that new baby smell. I do not think, it was so awesome when Milo was a helpless blob who couldn't communicate, I'd love to do that all over again. If only babies could be born at around 11 months old, I might feel differently about the whole thing.
Also if Steven could carry this one. Then we might have a deal.
All of which reminds me just how long it is taking my body to recover from pregnancy and labor. Over a year later, I'm still dealing with the aftermath of creating another human being. I went to get a facial last week and the facial lady asked if I had had a recent pregnancy. I wasn't sure if 14 months ago qualified as recent, but I said yes. She told me I had some kind of weird pigmentation on my skin that people get during pregnancy that would require many hours and many lasers to correct. Yay! More ways pregnancy is disfiguring!
And yet, everyone wants to know when we're going to get working on baby #2 - the combination of Milo entering full-blown toddlerhood and my entering my 35th year, I guess. But I cannot possibly conceive of going through all of this again. The morning sickness, the insomnia, the crying, the every-2-hour feedings. For some reason the labor and delivery I can imagine doing again - in retrospect that lasted only 36 hours, while the morning sickness, the late-night feedings and the insomnia lasted months. And if I'm this exausted with one baby at 34, how will I be at 36 or 37 with two babies?
Still, my body has been saying all kinds of ridiculous things to me lately. Like: don't you miss being pregnant? NO! Isn't it nice when Milo curls up on your lap? That won't last forever, you know. SHUT UP!
And then on the other hand we have Elizabeth Vargas, who apparently left her position anchoring the evening news when she became pregnant with baby #2. I had to find this out from watching Oprah, because I do not watch the evening news. (Does anyone? Is there anyone left out there who doesn't get their news exclusively from The Daily Show?) There is no question that life is easier on a working mother when there is only one child... Vargas says she hopes she'll be able to become an anchor again when her kids are older. And apparently NOW sent her a nasty letter, because that is how feminism should work.
Lucky for me, I still hate babies. The one thing I do not think, when thinking about baby #2, is how great it would be to have an infant around. I do not think, aww, they're so cute, I miss that new baby smell. I do not think, it was so awesome when Milo was a helpless blob who couldn't communicate, I'd love to do that all over again. If only babies could be born at around 11 months old, I might feel differently about the whole thing.
Also if Steven could carry this one. Then we might have a deal.
Labels: Babies
posted by Hana @ 12:51 PM
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